Suck Sucks
and having Cancer is Hard
Each day I am faced with new obstacles sometimes new symptoms and always new realities.
What I can eat today, I may or may not be able to eat tomorrow
Activities that were once easy now pose new challenges
and I am reminded often of my journey and this season of my life
It is easy to sink into the Dark, to feel the weight of my diagnosis.
It is easy to feel discouraged and burdened
and too often it feels like that its only hard days and can'ts
Unintentionally (or sub consciously) as the anxiety has increased, as the journey has progressed, and as time passes I have started bracing myself for what was coming next, tensing at the anticipated and slowly sinking into my present reality.
I have come to expect (though am never prepared) an increase in these thoughts and feelings as I draw closer to the next infusion. Each round a little sooner and a lot stronger.
Last weekend was no different, just days before my 6th infusion
My anxiety was high, my body was weary and I was feeling my reality deeply when a dear friend blessed me with her culinary skills and creativity.
This is what she made...
Camel Cookies
To celebrate Half Way (Hump Day) of my Infusions
It was just the bit of encouragement (or bribing) that I needed
These silly little cookies were just the reminder I needed
They reminded me that there is
always something to celebrate
sweet moments can be found in the midst of every day
Joy comes in all shapes and sizes
and blessings await
Dark will still be Dark
Suck will still suck
Cancer is still hard but I am half way,
