Until the chemo fog lifts is challenging.
I have realized this go around the new "norms"of my journey and have been faced with the challenge of half way done and half way to go.
To borrow the words from my Dad, the following pretty much sums up a typical day on this road to healing.
The familiar characters (nausea, fogginess, loss of appetite, exhaustion, mouth sores, anxiousness, tears, frustration, good intentions gone awry, etc.) continue to insist on taking their turns playing their roles.
Thankfully, there aren't too many crowd scenes and none has become the star of this show. And still, joy finds a way to make an appearance and gracefully moves to center stage.
Yup- that pretty much says it all. And its hard. Yet when I get quiet and it would be easy to think of what is "lost" or on hold its your tangible expressions of love and support that overwhelm my thoughts and
Your whispered prayers that blessing me with Joy and the motivation to take the next right step.
As I head into the weekend before infusion #7 the anxiety is high (as I am learning to expect and accept) and I am faced with the a choice of how to spend my time, my energy and where to direct my thoughts.
And this is what I choose...
An accessory of beauty, liquid joy in a cup, hanging on and holding tight, embracing my new Sloth like movements, Choosing Joy and remembering the ninja fighting skills just with in reach.
Monday is coming but its not here yet!
