Visitors from Across the Pond

As if the end of school wasn't enough to celebrate, the arrival of our dear friends from the UK for a week was the cherry on top :)

Waiting with our sign to greet Lisa and Roni after a long flight.

 First hugs

 Nothing beats a hug from your best friend

 Proof that we collected the right passengers

 Two besties in Indy...

Our days were filled with much laughter and many memories 

Games of Life 

 Days by the pool

 and outings for ice cream (or Frozen yogurt)

Everything we did, we did with smiles and giggles. 

Late night chats, movie marathons and all the other ordinary adventures of best friends. 

Meals at our favorite restaurants 

(BJs Brewhouse for lunch and Pizookies)

We even snuck in a day at the pond with our favorite Cowboys

Dinner and Drinks

And a final coffee (don't worry, we had plenty :) 

And suddenly the week was over and it was time to say Good-bye

A utterly wonderful, fantastic, and blessed week. 

The perfect blessing and distraction before Chemo #12. 

We miss you and hope to see you soon dear friends. 

From waiting comes JOY

Its in the quiet moments after waiting that I continue to find joy in this journey.

The Joy of knowing others are holding me up in prayer when I can can't hold myself up
The joy and pleasure of praying for others
The privilege to stand in the gap for the needs and brokenness of my friends, loved ones, and strangers

The simple joy of a cup of a coffee delivered to my bedside

Sunshine out the window
The end of school (no more homework) and beginning of summer
and the promise that Joy comes in the morning

With my eyes fixed up and my mind focused on Joy,
The days get a little shorter, the evenings a bit more peaceful and I slowly begin to rest.

And its only then that I can begin to look to another day and know that I can do this!

End of Year Awards

School is nearly done for the year.

As always, there are end of year awards to attend and while Chemo 11 prevented me from being there in person, I was blessed by the littles teachers, school staff, and dear friends who made sure this Momma had pictures and videos of the special moments.

Lillian received the Character Award (student of the year for her class). Her teachers kind words were just the encouragement Lillian needed (her Momma too).
Lillian worked hard this year to overcome challenges in reading and to find Joy in the journey.
We are so proud of her hard work and perseverance toward success.

Cooper celebrated the end of kindergarten with snow cones, awards and big smiles for summer.

Look out first grade, here comes Cooper.


Its hard to believe another year is complete and next year will be the last year these two will be in the same building until High School.

Glad its summer and we can have lazy days by the pool, movie days, and lots of momma snuggles.

Pondering's from Rapunzel's tower: Waiting

My desire in writing this blog has been to be authentic and open handed with my journey. I have questioned on several occasions if I have "cheated" you or allowed my pride to hide the less glorious aspects of my illness.

And I have laid here these last few days pondering how to pull back the curtain a little further.

This has been my Chemo week ...

Days where I have no energy and can barely get out of bed
Hours slowly ticking by waiting for the next round of meds that might offer slight relief
Nights filled with paralyzing fear and anxiety
Moments that steal my breathe and the panic rests on my chest like the weight of an elephant.

I cry (a lot)
Then I apologize (for not being strong enough or able to endure it again)
and cry some more

And I wait
I wait for the feelings to pass
I wait for the symptoms to subside
I wait for relief
and I wait.

Chemo #11

Just another normal infusion day...

Except this day, my wish came true :)

Dory finally got her detour to Target.

For those that may not understand the significance of this let me explain...
One of my early questions to my doctor was "Can I drive myself to chemo... the answer was No"
Several weeks later as Rob was driving me to my infusion I shared that I understood why a person could not drive themselves to an infusion.
1. They would forget where they were supposed to be going and end up at a better place like Target (dory moment)
2. And even if  they did know where they were supposed to go, they would want to go anywhere that wasn't the hospital

But the detour was short and it was time to start the day.

After a normal doctors appointment it was time to hook up to the drips and begin the infusion process.
Due to scheduling, lunch was smack in the middle of the treatment.

Frozen cokes (always a favorite) have become my "cold' choice for my Doxy infusion and I always love corn dogs (even if they are from a gas station.

We finished in enough time to pick my mother in law up from the airport (she blessed me with a second Starbucks)

then a  quick stop to see Lillian in her Wax Museum (boy she was surprised)

 and then finally home. I was exhausted.

As many of you might see, my hair has begun to grow :) It is short and patchy in places but its a glimmer of Hope in this journey.
For now I will rest.

11 done, 1 to go :)

Piano Recitals

Another year of piano lessons is finished and we enjoyed listening to her perform in the Spring Recital.

Well done Lillian! We are so proud of you.

Happy Mothers Day

Love from this Momma's 3 Favorite Sparkles!

Mothers Day Tea

This little Sparkle was so sad to miss school (he has been home sick most of the week)and taking his Momma to the Mothers Day tea so he and Nana brought the Tea to Momma.

Cooper sang me the Mommy Song and we shared cake and punch while I looked at the pictures he drew and his favorite Momma list.

It was just what this Momma heart needed :)

Relay for Life

Each year the Sparkles (and Nana) participate in the Hendricks county's annual Relay for Life for the American Cancer Society. 
The Sparkles (Madison, Lillian, and Cooper) walk several laps in honor of those who have or had cancer.

This year is especially special, because they are walking for their Momma is fighting her battle with Hodgkins Lymphoma.

Each year Nana  purchases luminaries which will line the walkway of the Relay. Cooper was our outstanding decorator, honoring those in our family who have survived cancer (Aliza, Lee's mom, and my mom) and those who valiantly fought but lost their battle (my dad and Lee's sister Barb) 

The luminaries are distinguished by Survivor and In Memory but I would add a third category.... In Battle.

So to all the people who are currently battling cancer, to the brave survivors and to those we dearly miss  we honor and celebrate you, especially this weekend, pledging our continued support and prayers. 

Pastor's Hot Date Challenge

During a recent sermon series (Marriage Soundtrack) our lead pastor challenged the husbands in attendance to plan and go on a creative date with their wives and submit the details (and proof) to the never been used before email address myhotdate@tpcc.org. The church staff would later vote and the winning couple would receive an evening on the town as a prize.

For Rob and I (nearly 10 years of marriage) this challenge lead to a conversation which detoured down memory lane and the adventures we shared the two years leading up to our marriage. We quickly came to the conclusion that we didn't really "date" in the traditional sense... we adventured, we traveled, we went places, we marked things off our want to do list and made a lot of memories.

We joked about the definition of "creative" and shared ideas back and forth both trying to ignore the "elephant in the room" my cancer and the limitations and changes it has brought to our life.

Creative has a different meaning in this season of our life.
No trips or adventures, nothing too exhausting, careful of crowds and germs, plans that can be easily altered and nothing too far in the future.
I figured that the reality would be... Nothing creative right now, but some day soon.

Then Friday came...
and my husband blessed me with our creative date.

It wasn't Pinterest inspired.
It didn't fit the textbook definition of creative (relating to or involving the imagination or original ideas)
It wasn't out of the ordinary.
It wasn't something new or never tried before.

It was perfect and it was US.

My husband blessed with an evening of comfort.
He washed and rubbed my feet- allowing me to experience something I enjoy (foot massages) but in an environment that was safe and without concern for germs and risk of infections.

He provided an appetizer (which I always ask for at a restaurant- too impatient to wait to for the entrees).

And indulged my desire for "photo" memories

He chose a menu and adjusted the recipe to fit my ever changing dietary restrictions- focusing on food that I have enjoyed in the past and desiring to provide a meal that tasted good to me.

He served me

I enjoyed restaurant style food without having to leave the comfort of our home or worry about crowds, germs, or having to changing my clothes

He even decorated the table (who would have known that having fake flowers as your wedding bouquet would be a continued decoration and joy in the years to come).

We ate, we talked, and we enjoyed the leisure of a quiet meal in a comfortable place.

And then we cleaned up together and I enjoyed the normalcy of being my husband's helpmate and sharing the load which was another gift.

Finally, the evening ended with another Just Us Thing... we climbed in the convertible (a dozen years ago it would have been a motorcycle) and ended our date on a sweet note...

He knew me, he blessed me, and he loves me.

I am grateful for this challenge and thankful to be married to a man who knows me, my needs and my wants and who chooses to serve me.